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I Used to Look Ahead I Fear

My son, Michael, was a lonely, shy 12-year-old when we first signed him up for Christian Service Brigade. My wife, Liz, and I (pictured) heard about the program from a friend and we hoped it would help him socially. I had no idea what a life-changing experience it would be for our entire family. We will never forget picking him up from the church after his first battalion meeting.

We watched 50 teenage boys hugging each other as they said goodbye for the night. We had come across something radical.

I grew up without a father, thrust into a life of uncertainty and hardship. My beautiful mother, even with her best attempts to love and raise me, could never fill the void I had for a male role model and a father’s love. I responded to the Gospel as a 30-year-old man and began a new life dependent on His Word and other faithful Christian men to show me what it looked like to be a godly man. 

Now at 51 years old, God continues to lavish gifts of grace on myself and my sons. I used to look ahead in fear, wondering how I could ever show my sons how to be the man that I was still struggling to become. But now I can confidently say that when God gave three sons to me, it wasn’t because I was a model father. It was because God had begun a good work in me and He would be faithful to see it through. Christian Service Brigade is one of the ways God has provided real teaching and practical examples of what godly men should look like.

Because of the teaching at CSB, I watched my 12-year-old son morph into a humble and loving young man who loves to serve others.

I noticed the genuine, strong and loving friendships he developed with the other young men who attended Brigade. He was most impacted by his squad’s culture of humility and openness as he witnessed the younger men and the older mentors recount their failures and God’s immense faithfulness in their lives. They shared without fear and endeared an even stronger love and bond to each other.

Because of the teaching at CSB, I watched my 12-year-old son morph into a humble and loving young man who loves to serve others.

I noticed the genuine, strong and loving friendships he developed with the other young men who attended Brigade. He was most impacted by his squad’s culture of humility and openness as he witnessed the younger men and the older mentors recount their failures and God’s immense faithfulness in their lives. They shared without fear and endeared an even stronger love and bond to each other.

I began to attend the battalion nights with my son Michael, now 15, and we are joined this year by my 12 year old son, Miles (pictured). My 6-year-old son Mason can’t wait to have his turn to attend Christian Service Brigade!

Michael is now serving as a corporal of a squad and he calls Brigade a “leadership laboratory.” It is a place where young men can tinker and experience in a hands on way, how to become a godly man. They are learning about genuine male friendship, integrity, conviction, unity, repentance, and are being equipped to lead and to serve in their homes, their jobs, their communities and the local church.

At Brigade they are completely safe to admit their failures and weakness, fully expecting that with understanding and grace also comes challenge, rebuke and accountability. The men at Brigade press on towards Christ together. “Christian Service Brigade has served to fill the gaps left by sinful destruction in my life.”

It has strengthened my purpose and resolve to teach my sons to be godly men and to discard the futile and shallow definitions of masculinity the world throws at them. I cannot help but be amazed at God’s miraculous intervention in my life to break cycles of despair and sin and I no longer look ahead in fear. CSB has given me a glimpse of what it looks like to pass on an inheritance in the faith and give an account of God’s faithfulness to the next generations of men to come after me.

We’re here to help you build boys into men. Someone will disciple your boys. Don’t let it be the world. Let it be you.

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